Helicoptering
Yeah, yeah. Everyone knows being a helicopter parent is a bad thing. I try very hard not to be the kind of parent that hovers so closely I smother my kids. But this week was definitely a helicopter week.
Why?
M started driving herself to school.
Now, this is a joyous event that I have been eagerly awaiting for years. From the moment we chose her high school and I realized just how much driving was in my future, I started counting down the days until she turned sixteen. Now, just like potty training back in the day, I was too eager, not considering the personality of my oldest child. Driving was not something she wanted to do-- ever-- or at least anytime before some mythical period in adulthood when she would feel "ready." Yeah, forget that!! In the end, I threatened her with losing her phone if she didn't get a learner's permit, and then after almost two years with a learner's permit (which involved a lot more demanding and threats to ever get her to practice driving), I finally scheduled her against her will for a road test to get her license.
She is now a senior. So a little later than my dreams of having her drive starting her sophomore year. Oh well. Better late than never. But even though we went in and got a parking permit the day after she got her driver's license, she flat out refused to drive to school yet.
Which was probably a good thing.
Her school started a new traffic flow plan this year and it was a complete stroke-inducing nightmare. I'm glad she wasn't the one driving. It didn't get any better the first week, but it quickly became obvious that it was parent drop off/pickup that was going to eternally suck. The student parking side wouldn't be half as bad. So the stroke inducing stress would be slightly alleviated if M could just start driving herself to school. I gave her three days of practice driving all of us to her school, where we did a driver switcheroo and I took the other kids on to their school, but then informed her that her grace period was up, she was doing fine, and now she was going to drive herself to school on her own or else.
But.
It really is a crappy, long, busy drive for a beginning driver.
So on the first day of her enforced driving I decided to follow her all the way in the van. The younger kids and I loaded up and sat in the garage for a gazillion years (it seemed) waiting for her to finally pull out of the driveway. By this point I was sweating bullets. The only prayer of M being able to park in her assigned spot with no drama (parking is not her forte) is to arrive early enough that she beats most of the other drivers. So the longer we sat there, the more I stressed. Then to make matters more fun, it decided to rain, for the first time in months. Not a minor drizzle either-- a full monsoon season drenching rain. Gee, M, no pressure.
Well, she finally finished adjusting her mirrors and her seat and her glasses and her mindset (or whatever she was doing for fifteen minutes in the driveway) and pulled out at last. I started to back out and immediately realized that something felt off with my tires. As soon as I started forward down the street, my tire pressure indicator went on.
OH heck no, I couldn't have a flat tire. Not when I was trying to follow M to school!
I pulled over, hopped out in the pouring rain, and checked the tires. The front tires looked a little low, but there weren't any obvious flats. So jumped back in the van and continued on. M, too nervous to go on, was sitting at the stop sign waiting for me to catch up.
The first half of the drive to school was uneventful, if you consider sky high blood pressure to be uneventful. My head was starting to pound. M is a very cautious driver, but our route includes another very busy high school (lots of teenage drivers) and a ton of rushing commuters who tend to cut people off and drive 15-20 mph over the speed limit. But she made it through the first three sticky stretches just fine. (I've driven this route every school day for three years now, so yeah, I know where the problem areas are.) Then we were reaching area #4, the worst. It includes a left turn in a horribly busy accident-prone intersection. Not only was it raining, but this particular morning they decided to close half the road for paving.
Seriously??? Of all the days... However, M handled that like a pro. Finally we were in the home stretch. We followed her all the way until the turn into the school, and left her waiting in the line of students trying to get in. Headed straight for a gas station after that to check my tire pressure (yes, three tires were quite low) and get air.
I wanted to cry with both pride and anxiety. It was almost the same reaction as when I left M at school her first day of kindergarten.
And I have worried about her every day since, though she shrugs and says the drive is fine (though she still doesn't want to do it).
When will this get easier??? And oh my gosh, I still have four more kids who are going to put me through this....
Why?
M started driving herself to school.
Now, this is a joyous event that I have been eagerly awaiting for years. From the moment we chose her high school and I realized just how much driving was in my future, I started counting down the days until she turned sixteen. Now, just like potty training back in the day, I was too eager, not considering the personality of my oldest child. Driving was not something she wanted to do-- ever-- or at least anytime before some mythical period in adulthood when she would feel "ready." Yeah, forget that!! In the end, I threatened her with losing her phone if she didn't get a learner's permit, and then after almost two years with a learner's permit (which involved a lot more demanding and threats to ever get her to practice driving), I finally scheduled her against her will for a road test to get her license.
She is now a senior. So a little later than my dreams of having her drive starting her sophomore year. Oh well. Better late than never. But even though we went in and got a parking permit the day after she got her driver's license, she flat out refused to drive to school yet.
Which was probably a good thing.
Her school started a new traffic flow plan this year and it was a complete stroke-inducing nightmare. I'm glad she wasn't the one driving. It didn't get any better the first week, but it quickly became obvious that it was parent drop off/pickup that was going to eternally suck. The student parking side wouldn't be half as bad. So the stroke inducing stress would be slightly alleviated if M could just start driving herself to school. I gave her three days of practice driving all of us to her school, where we did a driver switcheroo and I took the other kids on to their school, but then informed her that her grace period was up, she was doing fine, and now she was going to drive herself to school on her own or else.
But.
It really is a crappy, long, busy drive for a beginning driver.
So on the first day of her enforced driving I decided to follow her all the way in the van. The younger kids and I loaded up and sat in the garage for a gazillion years (it seemed) waiting for her to finally pull out of the driveway. By this point I was sweating bullets. The only prayer of M being able to park in her assigned spot with no drama (parking is not her forte) is to arrive early enough that she beats most of the other drivers. So the longer we sat there, the more I stressed. Then to make matters more fun, it decided to rain, for the first time in months. Not a minor drizzle either-- a full monsoon season drenching rain. Gee, M, no pressure.
Well, she finally finished adjusting her mirrors and her seat and her glasses and her mindset (or whatever she was doing for fifteen minutes in the driveway) and pulled out at last. I started to back out and immediately realized that something felt off with my tires. As soon as I started forward down the street, my tire pressure indicator went on.
OH heck no, I couldn't have a flat tire. Not when I was trying to follow M to school!
I pulled over, hopped out in the pouring rain, and checked the tires. The front tires looked a little low, but there weren't any obvious flats. So jumped back in the van and continued on. M, too nervous to go on, was sitting at the stop sign waiting for me to catch up.
The first half of the drive to school was uneventful, if you consider sky high blood pressure to be uneventful. My head was starting to pound. M is a very cautious driver, but our route includes another very busy high school (lots of teenage drivers) and a ton of rushing commuters who tend to cut people off and drive 15-20 mph over the speed limit. But she made it through the first three sticky stretches just fine. (I've driven this route every school day for three years now, so yeah, I know where the problem areas are.) Then we were reaching area #4, the worst. It includes a left turn in a horribly busy accident-prone intersection. Not only was it raining, but this particular morning they decided to close half the road for paving.
Seriously??? Of all the days... However, M handled that like a pro. Finally we were in the home stretch. We followed her all the way until the turn into the school, and left her waiting in the line of students trying to get in. Headed straight for a gas station after that to check my tire pressure (yes, three tires were quite low) and get air.
I wanted to cry with both pride and anxiety. It was almost the same reaction as when I left M at school her first day of kindergarten.
And I have worried about her every day since, though she shrugs and says the drive is fine (though she still doesn't want to do it).
When will this get easier??? And oh my gosh, I still have four more kids who are going to put me through this....
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