Rough Going
OK, it's time for one of those frank but serious blog posts again. Nothing lighthearted, though I'll admit that I'm feeling much better than I was earlier today. Now I feel like it's time to pour my feelings out-- hopefully I make sense.
If you are reading this post in the US, you've probably heard about the tragedy in Dallas yesterday. (It was all over the news stations and social media. I had to try really hard to escape it.) In case you are reading this from somewhere else, there was a large protest in Dallas against the police. There are some people in this country that feel that there is a war on the black population by the cops, fueled by some recent cases where the police have shot and killed black men. The issue irks me a bit because I see it as one more way activists are trying to whip up racial discord in this country, but that's not really the point of my blog. Rather, let's get back to the tragedy. Someone (multiple someones?) decided to use that protest as an opportunity to kill a bunch of police officers. I've seen various numbers, but most commonly I've seen five officers killed and 11 others injured, as well as one civilian.
I know lots of tragic things happen all the time, and there have been worse terrorist attacks recently more people affected. (I don't know the details of who was behind the Dallas one, though I've seen the pictures of the one gunman who was killed, and I don't know his motive, but the act seems to fall into the category of terrorism as far as I'm concerned.) Anyway, this particular one hit me like a sucker punch to the gut. Because my husband is on a team that provides coverage for large protests out here in Arizona. It could have been him. It could have been me receiving a visit to tell me that my husband was never coming home.
Yesterday was hard, but today has been harder.
Terence got called out to essentially provide security at a similar protest here in our state today. The protest just started this evening, so I'm only a couple hours into my wait. I don't know when he'll get home tonight.
Today was the first time I have ever cried after sending him off to work. I know he faces danger every day, but honestly, I cope with it by blocking it out and putting my head in the sand. After all, anyone's husband could be killed on his commute and not come home. You have to live with the fear somehow. But today I couldn't block it out. It was staring me straight in the face. I sent my husband out to provide riot coverage for a crowd that is protesting against cops, some of whom are decent, good people, but some of whom scream for the death of "pigs." It's those ones who make my stomach twist into knots. And their numbers are growing. People who joke about killing cops, people who believe that cops deserve to be treated poorly, all the way to people who intentionally sit down and plan a way to kill a police officer and feel justified about it.
I hope it doesn't get worse. I hope that people will quit trying to fan these flames of outrage on social media. I hope the swell of support for officers and the sacrifices they make will be enough to pour cold water on the hate that some people are bent on stoking. Because Terence still has years to go until retirement, and it's hard enough as it is.
Please, please, please-- if you are one of those people who automatically assumes that the cops are out to get you, take a moment to remember that police officers are human too, with regular lives and families. There is a good chance that they are just trying to do their jobs, enforce the law, and make sure that they get home. There are bad cops in the bunch, just like there are bad teachers, bad doctors, bad auto mechanics, you name it. Those officers do deserve to face the consequences of their actions, just like anyone else. But that doesn't mean that whole swathes of officers are racist murderers and deserve to be treated hostilely.
For those of you also who watch social media videos (oh, cell phone videos of cop encounters are all over the place now) and rush to judgement based on what you think you see: remember that you don't have the whole story. Even if you think you do. More than one officer who was truly acting right in line with his training has been convicted in the court of public opinion and had his life ruined when he was just doing his job. It is not easy to make split second judgments, especially life or death ones. Wait until all the facts come out before you join a lynch mob. Even then, consider NOT joining a lynch mob. There are ways to push for justice without becoming screaming fanatics.
Enough pleading. Well, one more plea: Please, please let my husband and his fellow officers come home safely tonight.
If you are reading this post in the US, you've probably heard about the tragedy in Dallas yesterday. (It was all over the news stations and social media. I had to try really hard to escape it.) In case you are reading this from somewhere else, there was a large protest in Dallas against the police. There are some people in this country that feel that there is a war on the black population by the cops, fueled by some recent cases where the police have shot and killed black men. The issue irks me a bit because I see it as one more way activists are trying to whip up racial discord in this country, but that's not really the point of my blog. Rather, let's get back to the tragedy. Someone (multiple someones?) decided to use that protest as an opportunity to kill a bunch of police officers. I've seen various numbers, but most commonly I've seen five officers killed and 11 others injured, as well as one civilian.
I know lots of tragic things happen all the time, and there have been worse terrorist attacks recently more people affected. (I don't know the details of who was behind the Dallas one, though I've seen the pictures of the one gunman who was killed, and I don't know his motive, but the act seems to fall into the category of terrorism as far as I'm concerned.) Anyway, this particular one hit me like a sucker punch to the gut. Because my husband is on a team that provides coverage for large protests out here in Arizona. It could have been him. It could have been me receiving a visit to tell me that my husband was never coming home.
Yesterday was hard, but today has been harder.
Terence got called out to essentially provide security at a similar protest here in our state today. The protest just started this evening, so I'm only a couple hours into my wait. I don't know when he'll get home tonight.
Today was the first time I have ever cried after sending him off to work. I know he faces danger every day, but honestly, I cope with it by blocking it out and putting my head in the sand. After all, anyone's husband could be killed on his commute and not come home. You have to live with the fear somehow. But today I couldn't block it out. It was staring me straight in the face. I sent my husband out to provide riot coverage for a crowd that is protesting against cops, some of whom are decent, good people, but some of whom scream for the death of "pigs." It's those ones who make my stomach twist into knots. And their numbers are growing. People who joke about killing cops, people who believe that cops deserve to be treated poorly, all the way to people who intentionally sit down and plan a way to kill a police officer and feel justified about it.
I hope it doesn't get worse. I hope that people will quit trying to fan these flames of outrage on social media. I hope the swell of support for officers and the sacrifices they make will be enough to pour cold water on the hate that some people are bent on stoking. Because Terence still has years to go until retirement, and it's hard enough as it is.
Please, please, please-- if you are one of those people who automatically assumes that the cops are out to get you, take a moment to remember that police officers are human too, with regular lives and families. There is a good chance that they are just trying to do their jobs, enforce the law, and make sure that they get home. There are bad cops in the bunch, just like there are bad teachers, bad doctors, bad auto mechanics, you name it. Those officers do deserve to face the consequences of their actions, just like anyone else. But that doesn't mean that whole swathes of officers are racist murderers and deserve to be treated hostilely.
For those of you also who watch social media videos (oh, cell phone videos of cop encounters are all over the place now) and rush to judgement based on what you think you see: remember that you don't have the whole story. Even if you think you do. More than one officer who was truly acting right in line with his training has been convicted in the court of public opinion and had his life ruined when he was just doing his job. It is not easy to make split second judgments, especially life or death ones. Wait until all the facts come out before you join a lynch mob. Even then, consider NOT joining a lynch mob. There are ways to push for justice without becoming screaming fanatics.
Enough pleading. Well, one more plea: Please, please let my husband and his fellow officers come home safely tonight.
Comments
Sorry you have to go through this! xoxoxox