Insanity, or the Try, Try Again Method

I'm sure you heard that saying about insanity, the one that goes something like "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."

This describes my evening perfectly.

Right now it's a very hormonally charged time of the month for me.  And as you may surmise, I get to experience this every month.  Every single month for a period of several days we have horrific evenings where nothing the kids do is good enough, and any real mischief completely pushes me beyond the breaking point into losing my cool with the kids.  Unfortunately, in my frustration I am likely to resort to spanking with the younger kids and blistering sarcasm with the older kids, both of which fall devastatingly short of my own standards of mothering.  This is followed by serious mental recriminations and tearful repentance and determination to do better next time (and hope that my relationship with my kids will not suffer from my monthly lack of calm, rational, mature parenting).  More than once I have vowed that the next month things will be different, with depressing lack of success when it comes down to it.

This month, I knew, I knew when I was headed for the hormone danger zone.  I figured it out Saturday, after several normal everyday situations had brought on the tears.  So I tried to mentally prepare myself to take everything in stride, to be proactive in preventing situations that might set me off.

Yet we still had a mom-meltdown tonight when I discovered a couple of messes that K had left, and not only did I get mad at K, I got mad at all the kids.  Out came the harsh rebukes and the sarcasm.

Insanity.

But how do I change what I am doing so that I can get different results?  The biggest factor seems to be my PMS hormonal craziness, and how do I change that???

Comments

Amy said…
I have the same problem, but less I think because I only have 2 kids to drive me crazy. I have heard that Birth control can help with the moodiness but mine was actually worse when I was on it....so I guess I have no real suggestions but I know how you feel
Stefanie said…
Maybe discuss with your doctor the possibility of not having your period? Or maybe the could prescribe something. Sorry that you struggle, I can relate. I feel like I turn into a monster during certain times of the year.
brooke said…
oh goodness, i'm the same. i hate that i sometimes end up spanking or yelling, when that isn't the type of parent i want to be. but alas, my emotions (hormones/chemicals) get the better of me. the only thing i've noticed that helps me when i'm having that time of the month is to lower my expectations, both of myself and my kids. that way i can be happier with the lack of completion and the constant mess around me. this also is something i try to practice on any special occasion day (mothers day, anniversary, my bday). otherwise i'm depressed and angry.
kristi said…
How about this summer call me. On those hormonal days we can grill hotdogs and wear the kids out in my backyard with the sprinklers. Then when I go crazy I'll call you. We'll have each others back on those hard parenting days! :)
Anonymous said…
Sorry about that, Heidi. It totally describes me when I try to go off my depression meds. I am just not the easy-going person I normally am. I'm sure your doctor could prescribe something that would work for you. I think that's something most women suffer from. I hope you can get help for it. Kristi has some good ideas.

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