The Enrichment Illusion

Tonight is our Relief Society Enrichment meeting. One of the quarterly ones, where they're going to have dinner and a program, the whole shebang. I don't know about you, but in my younger years I was an Enrichment rebel. (Only it was Homemaking back then.) In fact, I wasn't just a rebel, I was downright hostile toward the whole concept of Homemaking. Somehow before I was even old enough to go to Relief Society I blanched at the thought of going to some "weekday meeting where a bunch of old ladies get together and do crafts."

Once I was married I made the effort to go a few times and learned that Enrichment wasn't just about doing crafts (though those ones tend to be the best attended.) But I still didn't like it. Being a bit on the shy side, it seemed like I was always hovering on the outskirts feeling uncomfortable. (Not that I'm blaming anyone for not "fellowshipping" me. I know that nine times out of ten everyone else is feeling just as shy.) So I still only made an appearance occasionally, maybe once or twice a year.

Now, since I've had the experience of putting these shindigs together and then hoping against hope someone will come, I do try to go to at least the quarterly ones. So I'll make the effort to load up my four kids and make the half-hour drive to the chapel tonight. But still I'm a bit wary.

Do you want to know why? Maybe I'm not the only one who has a problem with this.

Any of these opportunities I have to mingle with other women I get an acute case of comparison-itis. I look all around me and see beautiful women who seem like everything is going well for them. Their children are well-behaved, their husbands are candidates for the Peter Priesthood award, their homes are immaculate, they have actual producing gardens, they cook healthy and frugal meals three times a day (and their children eat them), they have a vacuumed and sweet-smelling vehicle, they never lose their temper, they have a ten-year supply of food storage, they easily create beautiful artsy decorations for their home, they keep in shape without exercising, they are always smiling, they have money to burn at the mall, they have the faith to move mountains, and they are surely but one step away from being translated and caught up to heaven since they are already so close to perfection.

I'm only being kind of silly here. It's not logical, and I know as well as you do that all women have challenges and no one is what they seem on the outside, but still, my irrational, critical side loves to use Enrichment as a chance to beat up on myself.

But you know, when I go to Enrichment tonight, some other poor sister will probably look at me and think, "Hey, she's really got it together. She has a happy marriage, four beautiful children, and she's really getting into good shape. They are well-enough off for her to be a stay-at-home mom, she seems so happy all the time, and she's got such a strong testimony. She's really got it together-- why can't I be like that?"

If only she knew that my house is a disaster, I've fed my kids junk food all day, I haven't gotten any of my chores done, and I'll probably yell at my kids at least once every five minutes from the moment we leave the church until I get them into bed. People just aren't always what they seem!