Teacher's Un-Pet

What kind of student were you in high school? Were you one of the kids who was the life of the class, always cracking jokes and being borderline disruptive? Were you so apathetic toward school that you paid little attention to whatever was going on around you, especially whatever your teacher was saying? Were you a social butterfly who sat next to all her friends and chatted every chance you got? Were you the kind that sat in the front of the room and actually answered the teacher's questions (perhaps earning the title "Teacher's Pet")?

I was the kind of student who did my work and kept my head down. In most classes I did little socializing. I never volunteered an answer for a teacher. I certainly never cracked jokes or acted disruptive in any way. I guess occasionally I was apathetic, depending on how tired I was or how boring the class was. But I was conscientious about completing homework and projects and did pretty well as a whole in my classes.

I was the kind of student that most teachers appreciate but never think much about. In high school I was never a favorite of my teachers, though they seemed to like me well enough. (The strange thing was, many of my teachers seemed to like the class clown types the best, even if they were disruptive. Let's face it, they were entertaining at the very least, and teaching must get monotonous sometimes.) Anyway, I didn't mind being a mostly invisible student. I was shy, and it suited my nature. At least none of my teachers disliked me.

Well, all except one.

Since I was so used to blending into the background, I never could understand why this particular teacher was so hostile to me. I did my work, I was never rude or disruptive, and I tried to do whatever she asked. But it was clear to me from early on in the year that for some reason this teacher really had something against me. Perhaps she could sense my lack of interest in her class. She was my honors English teacher, you see. English has always been one of my best subjects, but by this point in time I was already growing tired of the tedious deconstruction of literature we were always asked to do. What was the symbolism of this passage or what greater message about society was this author trying to communicate? Halfway through the year I'd decided most modern literature was boring as all get out. I knew all the right things to say, appropriate criticisms to make and conclusions to draw, and I was learning quite well how to write a paper defending a point of view that I didn't personally believe. But it was BORING. And I just couldn't see how any of this was relevant to real life, other than helping me get ready for the AP test.

Maybe my teacher sensed my lack of fascination with her oh-so-illuminated intellectual insights into the books we read.

Maybe my occasional dozing off during class really ruffled her feathers.

OK, so I know my struggle to stay awake did not escape her notice-- and it bothered her. It was an early morning class, and between the part time job, massive homework load, and early morning seminary classes, I was often exhausted at school. But I had a far easier time staying awake in precalc and AP biology. Go figure. Anyway, she referred me to the nurse to make sure I didn't have a medical condition before she planned to send me to the vice principal for disciplinary action. I was seriously offended! It wasn't like I was the only kid who couldn't stay awake in her class! But it turned out to be an empty threat, and after the nurse confirmed I wasn't narcoleptic or suffering from mono, the teacher let it drop. Let's face it, the VP probably would have laughed at her. ("So let me get this straight: you want me to discipline this honors student who never disrupts your class and gets all A's because once in a while she dozes off?" As he rolls his eyes in exasperation and thinks of the long list of kids he needs to deal with for brawling during break time.)

The strange thing about all this is that apparently I'm still taking it personally, years and years later. Silly. One of my many teachers over the years didn't like me, so what???? It's a good thing I'm not in the public eye though. I think I would shrivel up inside if I was getting constantly personally attacked by people who only vaguely know me. How does Sarah Palin stand it?