A Bedtime Snack of Guilt

Yesterday, just before I collapsed into bed, I was throwing myself a huge guiltfest. After all, in one day I SHOULD be able to study my scriptures, train for a triathlon, feed my children, vacuum every last crevice of my house (including moving all the furniture and getting under the couch cushions), supervise my children getting their chores done, work on a novel, wash and fold at least four loads of laundry, read a book on astronomy, take my kids to the library, teach piano lessons, do the dishes, change sheets on the beds, arbitrate some records for familysearch, oversee family scripture reading & prayers, and read to my children and get them into bed at a decent hour. Oh yeah, and I should be flossing my teeth.

So of all that long list, by bedtime I had not done my records arbitration, every dish in our house was still piled on the counter waiting to be washed, and I was just too tired to bother with flossing my teeth. Just as I climbed into bed I spent a couple of minutes telling myself what a lazy sack I am because I didn't do these three things!

Irrational, I know. Why is it that I can be so kind to other people and not to myself? I would never consider any other mother lazy just because she didn't manage to do everything on her list. We all have to-do lists that are so long we'd need a full team of help to get it all done in a single day.

Today is likely to be even busier. I have five piano lessons, an hour long run, grocery shopping, dishes, and four more loads of laundry as my absolute musts for the day. Terence left at 5am, bound for training out in the middle of the desert, and I can't expect to see him until bedtime. So really, I should cut myself some slack before I even start. Maybe I should chant a mantra all day: "It's OK if I don't get it all done, it's OK if I don't get it all done!"

After all, one person can't do everything, even a frantic stay at home mom!